Avoiding Crisis

to blog or not to blog…

with 4 comments

i’m thinking about closing down this blog.  doesn’t seem like i can find the time to write these days.  i haven’t made a definite decision yet but i’m leaning towards pulling the plug.  I’ll let you know what i decide.

Written by nicolemarie

May 21, 2008 at 11:25 pm

Posted in life

it’s okay…

with 3 comments

to admit that sometimes when you’re child is crying for no apparent reason, throwing a fit of outrageous proportions for no obvious reason, that you aren’t sure you can take it anymore. 

to wonder what you did to deserve the most difficult days.

to wonder if you can handle even the moderately difficult days.

to daydream about what life would have been like had you not become a mother, to dream of all the things that you could have done or would be doing.

to think that maybe there are other people out there more able, more capable and better suited for this job. 

to talk about those difficult moments, those not so nice thoughts, with other people and not to be embarassed or ashamed of them.

to realize that you are a person, a human being, with needs apart from those of your children.

to satisfy those needs.

to follow your dreams.

to realize that you are only one person, only human, only capable of so much.

to ask for extra hugs and kisses.

to take time for yourself.

to ask for help when you need it.

to realize that you are loved for who you are, not for being perfect or a superwoman, but for just being you, imperfections and all.

happy mother’s day.

 

Written by nicolemarie

May 11, 2008 at 3:34 pm

Posted in life

house hunting

with 2 comments

is OVER!!!  at least, I hope it is.  i guess it’s not really over until we close on the house and that won’t be until mid-june.  but we have a contract!  so that’s good.  right?  i’ll fill you in more in the days to come. 

Written by nicolemarie

May 5, 2008 at 12:01 am

Posted in life

getting settled

with 2 comments

It’s only been 12 days since we arrived in the US.  It seems like we’ve been here a whole lot longer.  We’ve had a very very busy past 2 weeks…hence the silence on this here blog.   As Courtney pointed out not to long ago “blogging and moving do not go hand-in-hand.”  Oh no they don’t.  I might have to expand on that and say that moving and just about everything — calling old friends, returning emails, tweezing my eyebrows, catching up on senseless celebrity gossip a la perezhilton — don’t go hand-in-hand. 

We sent our first week back in the United States in Virginia at my mother-in-law’s house. We typically make a stop there on any vacation that we take to the US, so aside from a little thing like buying a car, it felt like we were on one of our vacations.

last weekend we packed up the car, the shiny new car, and drove 3.5 hours south to NC.  It still didn’t feel quite real.  Then we arrived at my brother’s house in Durham, dragged all of our crap into the house and started to unpack, and settled in a bit.  Then, all of a sudden, out of know where, it hit me, like a ton of bricks.  That same feeling I’ve had twice before when I arrived at my new house in a new country.  That same overwhelming, oh my gosh, what have i gotten myself into feeling that makes me want to crawl under a bed and hide from the world.  That same feeling that always precipitates panic attacks.  I was in my brother’s house, in the country that I grew up in, in a country where they spoke English, my native language, and yet still I was having this feeling.     

we are currently in durham, nc staying with my brother and pregnant sister-in-law.  it’s going as well as can be expected, staying with them that is.  nothing like adding four more people to a house only used to two. The kids are having a great time hanging out with their uncle and aunt, which is a great distraction from this whole transition.  Abbey is having a particularly difficult time with the move and continues to ask about going back “home.”  As a result she’s not sleeping all to well, which means that we aren’t sleeping at all.   But everyday it seems to be getting better.

Aside from trying to get used to being back in the US we have been spending all of our time meeting with schools, potential therapists for Owen, doctors and looking for a house.  Everything has gone surprisingly well thus far and we feel that we have finally made progress in getting Owen the services that he needs.  While we still have a while before we get everything set up and started, at least we’ve began the process.  On the house front we have put a bid on a home and hopefully will hear something by Tuesday afternoon.  Keep your fingers crossed for us!

This week brings more meetings and more time to get settled in.  Hopefully I’ll have some time to keep you all updated on what’s going on around here. 

until next time.

Written by nicolemarie

April 27, 2008 at 11:36 pm

Posted in life

breaks my heart

with 2 comments

abbey:  mommy, tomorrow can we visit my friends

me: which friends would that be?  we could call Miss. Julie and see if Lee and Grace can play.  Do you remember them?

abbey:  I want to visit my friends in Argentina. 

me:  abbey, we just left argentina.  we can’t go back so soon.

abbey:  but i want to see them.  if we can’t go tomorrow then maybe the day after tomorrow or the day after that?

me: sorry, sweetie, i don’t think so.  it’s a very long flight, remember?

abbey:  then maybe in 100 days?  could we go in 100 days?

me:  maybe.  we’ll see.  maybe in 100 days. 

abbey:  1…2…3…4…5…6…

 

Written by nicolemarie

April 18, 2008 at 10:12 am

Posted in crazy kids

19 reasons

with 2 comments

We are in the USA. Back home, I guess you could say. We arrived yesterday. I kinda felt like we were on vacation. That was, until my new cell phone arrived yesterday and we bought a new car today. It’s really sinking in that we have moved.

I need some sleep.

It was so darn hard to leave buenos aires; to leave the people, the place, the life.

There are a lot of reasons leaving was so difficult and I’m sure i will get to many of them in the days, weeks and months ahead as i reminisce about life in Argentina. But first, let me introduce 19 of those reasons. They are my dear, loving, supportive friends: 12 of them Argentine, 6 American, 1 Canadian and 1 Brit. (Really, there are 3 others I can add to this group, making it 22, but I don’t have their photos. boo hoo.)

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It’s only been 2 days and I already miss them so.

Written by nicolemarie

April 16, 2008 at 5:50 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

we’re leaving on a jet plane…

with 5 comments

don’t know when we’ll be back again.  someday.  i hope.  someday.

 

Written by nicolemarie

April 14, 2008 at 3:22 pm

Posted in life