Avoiding Crisis

scenes out the cafe window

with one comment

She sits across from her mother, her red converse clad feet tapping on the base of the table.  She shifts her position, fidgets, transfers her weight from side to side.  She can’t quite find a good spot to settle in to.  She speaks of her morning.  Holding her head in her right hand, fighting back the urge to cry, she wipes the occasional tear from her cheek.   She appears pensive and sad.  She holds her black canvas backpack in her lap, occasionally hugging it just as a little girl would a big soft teddy bear.  Her long blond hair blows across her face, strands stick to her damp cheek.  She doesn’t bother to fix it.  Her mother sits across the square table.  She slowly inches closer to her daughter’s side and gently rests her hand on her daughter’s shoulder.  It is a simple action of reassurance that only a mother could provide.  In that moment, the girl drops her head, and looking down at the emptiness, one hand grasping at her worn canvas bag, the other holding onto her mother’s, she cries.

Advertisements

Written by nicolemarie

November 14, 2007 at 10:30 pm

Posted in crazy writings

One Response

Subscribe to comments with RSS.

  1. Very nice opening. Nice overall, but you don’t have to state that “she appears pensive and sad”, your previous sentence has already accomplished that.

    Barry

    November 15, 2007 at 12:44 am


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: