Avoiding Crisis

and the answer is…

with 3 comments

It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Okay, so maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration and all. Anyhow, here’s the answers to the questions that were asked in response to yesterday’s post. In all fairness, and because I can’t think of a good reason why I shouldn’t do this, I will answer them in the order that they were asked. Oh, and if any of you have any more questions, please ask away, I like this game.

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Why do you live in Argentina?

The very short answer is because my husband works here.

The long answer is that I’m what you would call a trailing spouse of a United States diplomat. It sounds a lot more exciting and important than it really is.

By definition a trailing spouse is a individual who follows their husband/wife/partner to a new city/state/country because their husband/wife/partner has taken a new job and/or been transferred. This is the most basic definition.

In my case, as is the case with most diplomats and expatriates living outside of their own country, being a trailing spouse can be a bit more complicated due to cultural difference and the potential language challenges we face. There are a lot of issues that go along with being a trailing spouse in a foreign country, too many to discuss here, but a potential topic of a separate post.

Getting back to Argentina. We’ve lived here since July 2005. Our assignment is for 3 years, which means we have a little over a year to go. We will be heading to another country (hopefully a Spanish-speaking one) but maybe back to the United States between June and August of 2008. (And don’t ask me where we are going next ’cause I don’t know and I won’t have a clue until sometime in early 2008.)

Oh, and I love living in Argentina. In case you were wondering.

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Are you still going to hell?

Yes, Pete, probably. That is, if there is a hell?

Nothing has really changed with regards to my relationship with religion and everything that falls under the umbrella of religion, like God for example. At this point in my life, I just don’t think I’m ready (or even willing) to tackle this issue.

(For those of you who are a bit confused as to why someone would ask me this particular question, you’ll need to check out this and this to understand. Trust me, it’s not that random of a question as you might think. Nor is it rude coming from Pete.)

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What have you learned about marriage since your children were born?

Hmmm. That’s a tough one.

Here’s the thing. My husband and I have been married for 5 1/2 years. Of those 5 1/2 years, we’ve been parents for about 4 1/2 of them. So I’m not sure that I really knew what marriage was/is prior to having kids. Complicating things a bit more, of the 5 1/2 years that we’ve been married and the 4 1/2 years that we’ve been parents, we’ve spent 4 of those years living overseas – 2 in Lima, Peru and now 2 in Buenos Aires, Argentina.

I haven’t had, to say the least, a typical marriage. If there is even such a thing.

If there is anything I’ve learned since having kids it is that marriage is HARD WORK, that it’s not easy and it doesn’t just come naturally. It takes time and effort and patience to be a good wife. It’s too easy to become immersed in the role of parent and forget about the fact that you are also a wife. It’s hard, sometimes, to remember that the kids aren’t the only things that matter and that you also have this wonderful person who you have committed yourself too and promised to love and grow old with.

Like any relationship, marriage requires care and nurturing and to be honest, a lot of hard work.

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Written by nicolemarie

May 4, 2007 at 10:13 am

3 Responses

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  1. Argentina is one of my dream countries for some reason. And I’d be curious to live in the capital, even though it’s like a whole separate country on its own. 🙂

    La Flor

    May 4, 2007 at 12:22 pm

  2. Well, I love to travel so I think it’d be pretty cool to be a trailing spouse.

    Dawn

    May 4, 2007 at 6:47 pm

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