Avoiding Crisis

a woman boss = an awful experience

with 33 comments

I know, it’s a pretty harsh statement to make but it got your attention, didn’t it? And, unfortunately, in my case, it’s completely true. So the title should probably read ME + a woman boss = an awful experience. It should, but, I’m not going to change it because I doubt I’m the only woman who thinks this way.

Penelope Trunk over at Brazen Careerist posted about the idea of paying ones dues in the workplace and it got me thinking about my work experiences, and in particular, the experience of working for a female boss. It’s something I’ve wanted to write about for sometime now, I’ve even started one or two postings about it but never quite felt right about publishing them. The emotional aspect of it keeps getting in the way. Even after 5 years have passed, I guess I’m still bitter and angry about this. (And yes, I know, I am a holder-on-of-things. I’ve already established this and freely admitted to it so there is no need to remind me.)

Well, emotion and all….

I think that many successful women have major unresolved issues that they feel the need to take out on those who work for them, especially if that individual is of the same gender. It’s that whole, I paid my dues, so you must now pay yours mentality. But does this really explain why so many women bosses are just so damn bitchy? Out there in the rat race, why can’t women be nurturing and caring? I don’t want another mother, that’s not what I’m saying. But, please someone tell me, where are all the mentors? Why are women bosses so freakin’ mean?

What the hell did I ever do to deserve being treated like shit? They hire you because you graduated at the top of your class from a prestigious university, because they want someone who can think and be independent. They hire you to be a “fresh” perspective, to offer a “youthful” point of view, to bring new ideas to the table. But then they shoot everything down before you even have the opportunity to finish what you were trying to say because, as they like to remind you, what do you know about anything. You’re so young and naive and inexperienced. Blah, blah, blah.

Okay, so I know that what I’m saying here is totally based on my own experiences and is a crazy generalization that I shouldn’t be making, and especially shouldn’t be blogging about. ‘Cause knowing me it will come back to bite me in the ass somehow. Ah. But, why not? It’s not like I’m lying or anything or naming names or going on about how my first female boss felt it necessary to tell me, along with a room full of reporters, that I was a mere child who would never amount to anything unless I stepped back in line and wiped her ass. Okay, so that’s not exactly what she said, but it sure sounded a lot like that to me. But she did call me a child and it was in front of about 15 reporters. And I thought that having to communicate through digital voice recorder with my boss at my first post-college job was bad, at least HE never came out and flat out told me that I wasn’t going to amount to much in my life.

Why is it so hard for a female boss to take a young woman and want to help her. To sit her down in her office and say to her, when I started in this business, it was me and 15 guys and I had to pay my dues, but lucky for you, times are different and you don’t have to go through the same crap that I did. Instead, you get the whole schpeel about how when she was your age she had to start at the bottom and work her way up pushing and proving herself at every turn. She had to work 80 hour weeks and didn’t have time for a boyfriend. (Which somehow is supposed to be the root cause of her still very single status.) That no one was there to help her, to give her a hand or offer her a break. That “they” wanted her to fail at every turn and how she was determined to prove them wrong. How since she had to sacrifice, so do you.

Women, I swear, are SO much worse then men. I can almost forgive a man for his sexist behavior (okay, maybe not even almost forgive it, but at least somewhat understand it and blame society for it) but from a woman, it’s just so damn hard to see why it has to be this way.

And I know, it’s not this way for everyone. Maybe I just had two really bad experiences. Maybe?

So I won’t write off the idea of working for a female completely. At least I don’t think I will. But the next time I’m faced with the decision, it won’t be an easy one. That’s for sure. I guess you can say that I’ve learned my lesson the hard way.

What are your thoughts on this?


Written by nicolemarie

April 15, 2007 at 11:37 pm

33 Responses

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  1. Well either way you look at it you’ve had two horrible experiences. But I hope you don’t give up on women bosses just yet. I have never had a woman boss (only been one), so my answer might be a bit skewed. And it’s also only from a military perspective so yet again, might not be completely representational.

    Some of my Soldiers said they preferred having a woman leader because they felt like they not only had someone who could lead them by making decisions but also one who they tended to remember people had families and shouldn’t be working 14-hour days every day. This was of course as long as she could actually lead and get her job done.

    But that still doesn’t mean that are terrible women leaders out there. Like you said, I think most of us women understand and realize too many women had to “pay their dues” to prove themselves and now they think all women should have to do the same thing to prove themselves. It’s really dumb! Same thing happens in the military…but for everyone. It’s the whole thing about “I had to endure the crap work like digging foxholes, guard duty, etc so all of you will do the same thing.”

    Anyhoo, back to my original message: please don’t give up on women bosses!! Or better yet…just become the boss and make sure you be the mentor you never had!


    April 16, 2007 at 10:35 am

    • female bosses ARE bitches, I will never work for one.


      January 31, 2012 at 5:56 am

  2. I have had three women bosses during my work career, and only one was difficult and extremely demanding, but I now realize why she had to set very high standards, whereas when I was young I did not “get it”. Mainly, my experience is that women bosses were interested in mentoring, and allowed a great deal of leeway for me to flex my mind, decision-making capabilities, or abilities to bring necessary changes to the work situation.
    I believe there needs to exist a degree of humility and willingness to not always be right on the part of younger women when dealing with more senior women in work situation. Respect begets and garners respect back. I have the same regard for younger women who may be in a power position. They may have skills and capabilities distinct from my own, or an expertise that I may not have developed myself, thus it is important for an older woman worker to extend the same courtesy and respect for an younger (in years) boss.


    April 16, 2007 at 10:59 am

  3. Billie- the whole military thing puts the discussion of “paying your dues” on a completely different level – don’t you think? I mean isn’t the whole idea of parts of the training – like boot camp – intended to break the individual down so they can be built back up as a soldier? As for the issue with female bosses, it will be a few more years before i head back to work so I’m sure I’ll come to terms with my own experiences sooner or later and let them go and not hold it against every female manager that I potentially may work for.

    suburbanlife – it’s all about respect, I agree. But unlike your difficult boss who set very high standards, I had bosses who set no standards and didn’t push me to learn or grow. They had no respect for me and eventually I lost all respect for them. It’s not as though they were demanding, just catty and shallow. But again, as I’ve said, I had two really extreme experiences.


    April 16, 2007 at 9:28 pm

    • When that one boss called you a child. Didn’t you say something like, “wow that is
      I have been told to say something back. That way the BULLY will think twice about
      saying that to you again. That was so inappropriate.


      December 6, 2012 at 1:06 am

  4. Having just left a wonderful job that I truly loved because the new boss was so, as you say, freakin’ mean (and truly insane) I really feel for you. And still feel pretty sorry for myself. This boss was actually 2 years younger than I and I am no kid. I was very excited to learn the new boss would be a female. I was not only disappointed but very surprised she turned out to be so awful. Screaming fits, nasty memos and emails, talking to other employees about the object of her current ire. Or more like her “ire-of-the-moment-subject-to-change-without-notice.” She fired one of the very best members of our team, then lied to the board and said this woman just up and quit and no one knew why. Later she got caught in her lie when she made an unsolicited phone call to the fired woman’s potential new employer and absolutely trashed her. The vile was so bad the new employer knew it could not be true (and many, many others had spoken so highly of the victim). The boss hired another woman as a fundraiser in mid-October, and terminated her at Christmas saying she failed to bring in the money. Failed? She barely had time to get started. The boss made life so miserable for several women that they quit…yet she is very good to the males…almost subservient. She has replaced older, experienced workers with really young people who probably do not make her feel threatened. She is likely to get the organization sued before it is all over. Yet, the board keeps backing her. Oh…here is the kicker…this is a religious organization!!! I could go on and on with stories that would be very hard to believe. One thing I do want to add is that my husband has had a female boss for a few years now, and he says she is the best boss he has ever had. Maybe it is because her team is all men. Most female bullies bully other females. Women bulling male is very rare.


    September 20, 2007 at 12:38 pm

    • To the contrary, women feel exhilarated when they can dominate a man. As long as I live I will never work where women lead; it becomes an insidious work environment. Backstabbing, emotional outbreaks to feign victimhood, controlling, overbearing puerility, vindictiveness even violence in some instances. I don’t care what anyone says working with women and white knights is purgatory. Traded my comfortable desk job for a potentially rewarding door to door sales position with a prominent cable company. I make my own hours, i’m not confined to a desk, no more senseless meetings about the same shit, no more high school drama, no need to participate in childish compulsory birthday decorations, and no Olympic-style office competition with a bunch of baleful, wretched women who feel the need to challenge and keep a high heeled choke-hold on a mans jugular pointe.. The MANAGER would take it personal if you didn’t entertain her gratuitous offering of atonement candy. ✌🏽


      November 6, 2016 at 9:43 pm

  5. Having had two woman bosses that have treated me in the worst ways imaginable I sympathise. I have had two of the worst bosses one after the other and now I’m exremely paranoid about getting back to working again. Don’t get me wrong, I have had good women bosses and known good women bosses. But the hard lesson is that it is dangerous to get on the bad side of the woman boss. Once you do the woman boss does not forgive or forget. I work by contract for NonProfit Institutions so it is crucial that I get a good recommendation every end of contract. There is something about women bosses that make them much more unpredictable therefore difficult to work with. I recently lost a contract where I believe I was set up to fail and this after 20 years in the field with a good record. Woe be to you if the woman boss takes a disliking to you. The first one contiues to bad mouth me after leaving the institution where we worked. In fact she ended up having issues with her bosses but that does not matter to her. She cannot look in the mirror. My direct supervisor for the same institution was wonderful and mentoring and a woman. But there was a vast difference in charachter that came from the age of the individual. The Director was younger then both of us and extremely driven but at the same time prone to ranting and raving. I continued to work for the institution two years after the departure of my tormentor. Other people say that she is nice but has issues. Great, so we have to live with her issues. I’m sorry but to have ones reputation soiled by a vengful boss goes beyond issues. The vengeful boss should retire and take the issues somewhere else.


    September 24, 2008 at 11:50 am

  6. I can relate to you, I am working for a moody woman boss right now. Everyday I go to work I don’t know what kind of mood she is going to be in and what makes it worst is I am the only female under her supervision. So, she compares everything I do to how she would have done it. She shows major partiality to my male coworkers and she does not hide it either. Funny thing is, everybody ignores the fact that she is so moody and unfair. I have tried the brown nosing techniques and doing everything 10 times better than everyone else and nothing works with her. I can’t complain about her because she has all of the high ranks in her pocket. They absolutely love her. I don’t know if I should tell her how I feel or if I do will she play on it more. What do you suggest?


    February 12, 2009 at 11:51 pm

    • I have worked for over 30 years and my worst bosses were women, they are always in competition with you and if you slight them once in any way, they turn on you. I just left a really nice job because I had a 21 year old young snot for a boss. She had no personable skills, was sarcastic and extremely moody. Even if you went above and beyond, she couldn’t recognize it for fear it would degrade her position or viewpoints. I collect social security so I told them I was leaving and the reason for it. If you say how you feel and if she has excellent administrative skills, it will only make you look like a trouble maker and they will turn the table on you because getting rid of her would be an inconvenience to them. I actually would suggest that you find another job.

      Arianna Van Deusen

      February 10, 2011 at 4:39 pm

    • I can certainly relate! I am currently working for a women who is certifiable. As in your situation, one never knows what mood she will be in once she arrives. She rarely says good morning and often comes in smashing things onto her desk and offering up daggers for looks. She sits inches away from me however communicates primarily through emails or by throwing a sheet of paper onto my desk with a vengeance. I work in a very small department where no one says a word throughout the entire day as the boss does not like talking, and everyone tries not to further incur her wrath. The tension is palpable, so much so that those in other departments have commented on this. After expressing my concerns to HR, I was told that it is perfectly acceptable for someone to be in a bad mood everyday and that rude behavior should be overlooked. I was told that the only thing that matters is getting the job done. I had been told that there was an extremely high turnover during my initial interview and I choose to ignore the clear signs. It’s unfortunate as I have been told by everyone, including my boss that I am exceptional at my job, however it is difficult to work in an environment where most are miserable and choose to take that misery out on one another. The fact that this is perfectly acceptable makes the matter worse, not to mention that I am now the one who tried to rock the dysfunctional boat by speaking out. I am also new which makes it even more unacceptable. I had once been someone that could have been called passive aggressive. I would let the resentment build and quietly suffer in silence. The irony is that once I decided to express myself whenever I felt that I was not being treated the way I deserved to be treated, I opened up a hornet’s nest of problems. In these times when finding a steady job is so difficult for so many I have to now ask myself was it worth it? Sure I got some things off of my chest but nothing has or will change because of it. The truth is things are now even more uncomfortable and I am seriously thinking about looking for another job. While I do believe it is important to stand up for yourself when someone is mistreating you or trying to pull you down, in the real world of business no one gives a sh-t. You may be told that your company has an “open door” policy, but they truly do not want to hear your sniveling, no matter how justified it may be. My only advice to anyone in a situation similar to mine would be to keep their displeasure to themselves and start looking for another job if things become unbearable. The desires and needs of management will always supersede those of it’s minions.


      April 2, 2011 at 1:18 pm

      • Going through a horrible experience right now where the entire company has relocated to another town except for the 2 women in the billing office – myself, who just started 1 year ago and the other lady who has been there for 30 and who is in charge of the billing office. She also does not speak when I come in the door in the morning. She even pretends to be on the phone to avoid speaking to me, stomps around the office, slams all the doors, etc. There is also no talking and complete silence during the day. I used to wear my ear buds in one ear with the volume on 2 just so I would not go insane with the silence, but then I was handed a written office procedure stating that radios are not allowed during work hours. I have been treated so poorly on a daily basis, actually being called a “suck up” to the technicians I have to speak to, nothing I do is ever good enough. I am to provide a 24 hr turn around on all work done in a particular day. No matter how many invoices have came in, I have always met the deadline. Even then, no matter what difficulty I have in getting the information required from technicians that I need to create my invoices, or how much time it takes to get the info, I am still told that the amount of time it took me to produce the work was “unacceptable”. Still keep in mind, I have never missed the 24 hr turn around. I never take a lunch, never take any breaks and have not missed a single day. Yet still I am constantly criticized for everything I do. She even listens in on my phone conversations and tells me what I should and should not have said. I am also required to send her a copy of any email I receive from any manager of the company we are contracted to send invoices to and a copy of any replies that I send to them. It is getting ridiculous. I have wanted to contact the owner of the company and let him know just what kind of individual he has representing his company and see if there is anything he can do to get this woman off my back and just let me do my job. Now I have read your post and am glad I haven’t made that call yet. I think it is best keeping the “open door” policy in mind. I will just have to look for another job. I’ve kept hanging on to this one not wanting to give up. Also the pay is a bit more than most companies start out as in this area. The bottom line as you said is “the desires and needs of management will always supersede those of it’s minions”. I probably will not get anywhere by making that call.


        August 15, 2015 at 3:49 pm

  7. […] A Woman Boss Makes An Awful Experience:  A blog post from someone who has a female boss and how their experience has been pretty awful. […]

  8. Interesting post. I have had a number of women bosses–over six. Only one was fair and sane. The rest were horrible–including the current co-worker that thinks she is the boss. I’m a woman and I am loathe to work for another woman.

    Pat Minogue

    November 10, 2010 at 4:12 pm

  9. I SOOO UNDERSTAND. I’m sorry to tell you the most hateful bosses I’ve had have been women. In fact almost all the bosses I’ve had have been women – one worse than the one before. The current one takes the cake. She vendictive, evil, vengeful, shady, and dishonest to make the list short. She hasn’t only been this way to me, but to NUMEROUS others. We turn over employees like most people turn over socks yet HR doesn’t bat an eyelash (they are her friends after all). Ugh. I wish I could say you just had two bad experiences, but the truth is it’s really really hard to find a decent boss.


    May 30, 2011 at 10:55 pm

  10. Women are generally happy when told very specifically how to act and what to do. Once a women achieves relative success, she can gains self confidence by perpetuating an environment where the only role to success is adopting similar characteristics and behavior which leads to a very homogoneous “bland” workplace. Also, women make extremely emotionally driven business decisions which being a part of is absolutely draining. There is so much more stress working with women because of the constant need to take the extra steps to maintain shallow meaningless interpersonal relationships, not to mention, tolerating the tenacious female ego and surreptitious decision making. Also, women are much more competitive with each other and generally less tolerant than men.


    July 23, 2011 at 9:56 pm

  11. I feel for you. I’ve had two females bosses, and both have been just horrible. On the one hand, I am all for women getting ahead in the workplace. But on the other hand, I’d rather not work for another woman. Hang in there. I hope it gets better for you.


    July 24, 2011 at 8:18 pm

  12. Wow, you soooo need to email me!


    August 28, 2011 at 3:41 am

    • I am now on my fourth female boss, and am planning to quit after 10 weeks of hell. I’m a paralegal now, and worked as a legal secretary for 17 years for all male lawyers and was always treated with respect. If I made an error, it was not earth shattering, as they understood I’m human. I’m an older worker with alot of valuable experience, and now realize the only reason I keep getting these jobs in this bad job market is because these jobs are so hard to fill because of the women employers. I’ve always been an excellent employee, with great recommendations from past employers. I’ve never been fired. In the last 3 jobs (all female lawyers), I’ve been treated like garbage. As I’ve always been taught to respect my employers, I just put up with it and try to “nice them to death”. It doesn’t work. They just get worse because they think they can get away with it. All of the other employees in the office, including some young male associates (my boss is a partner), are afraid of her. Some of the other paralegals in the office told me if they got transferred to her, they’d quit. I thought it may be a trait of just female “lawyers”, but after reading some of these posts, I realize it’s female “bosses”. I owned my own business for 20 years, and would NEVER treat an employee the way I’ve been treated. My philosophy is “treat others as you want to be treated”, and I always did that, and all of my employees were happy. I bent over backwards to keep them happy because I realized “happy” employees make excellent employees. If an employee wasn’t working out and just couldn’t do the job after numerous tries to help them, I would just let them go. But I never mistreated them.

      Right now, in this market, I keep hearing “you’re lucky to have a job”. My spirit has been broken, I’m on tranquilizers, don’t sleep well, and dread going to work. I can’t even enjoy weekends anymore because of the impending fear of returning to work on Monday. It’s not worth it!! STAY AWAY FROM WOMEN BOSSES!


      September 24, 2011 at 8:04 am

  13. I’ve just transferred out of a position I held for 2 years because of my horrible female boss. Words of wisdom: when interviewing for a job, if possible find out if your potential female boss has a life outside of work. If they are divorced or have a string of failed relationships with their ex or their father, there will be hell to pay! My boss (from the job I just left) is over 50, fat, loud, divorced, never got her father’s attention, has a boyfriend who barely tolerates her, a deadbeat divorced brother who comes and goes as he pleases, a son who she showers with affection and a daughter who moved out of state, and takes it all out on her female subordinates. Three female workers have transferred out or quit from her department in the last 6 months. She makes us cry, she doesn’t allow us to go to training (we have to read the manuals of our male coworkers who are allowed to go to official training), and she give the female workers all the routine work “so that the boys can work on the important projects” (that’s a real quote). I have a masters degree in my field (computers), a successful marraige, I’m tall and slim, and she can’t stand it. So she promoted a coworker instead of me, a guy with a degree in English. She’s shooting herself in the foot to spite me, but she’s only hurting herself. She’s mean, and her reputation is well-known, After I transferred out, someone in another department commented that I lasted a lot longer than anyone thought I would. I’m in a new department, with another female boss, but this one is happily married, and her reputation is that she treats everyone with respect. Which seems to prove my theory.

    Thanks for the opportunity to vent, and I’m sorry to hear of anyone who has to endure this.

    By the way, I was a female boss in my last job, and my claim to fame is that no one ever quit while working for me, and this in a company that had a 25 % turnover rate. At the time, I was single (hadn’t yet married), so I’m not sure how that fits in with my theory. But it at least gave me insight into how I’d like to be treated as a subordinate.

    Not a Queen Bee

    November 19, 2011 at 9:21 am

  14. I don’t get the “I’ve paid my dues” rubbish because even if they have “paid their dues” then they are getting MORE PAY for it. If someone else who has “not paid their dues” or, in my case, “did not want to pay dues” as I am quite happy in a lower paying support job then why should I have to be treated like dirt because I CHOSE not to do the higher more stressful job. In life everybody choses what they want but that doesn’t entitle anyone to treat others badly.

    Alexandra Craw

    December 15, 2011 at 2:41 pm

  15. I have had three female bosses in my life. One was decent because she respected my abilities and allowed me to do my job. The other two created the worst work experiences I have ever had. The first was a married woman with a girlfriend on the side that the entire town knew about. When things were going well and projects were being completed on time and with great results, this boss would come into my office and “knock me off balance” by dropping some information that the board was unhappy or that some political storm was brewing that might mean my demise. None of this was ever true, by the way – she just used it to try to keep me in my “proper” position. The second boss was a malignant narcissist who treated everyone badly, but especially hammered on me like I was one of her kids (she actually told us all once that her daughter had to seek therapy because of the way she treated her. She touted herself as bringing accuntability to the organization but she never held herself to the same standard. I don’t know that all women in positions of executive power are bad but I won’t ever work for one again.

    Ron Wolfe

    March 23, 2012 at 1:52 am

  16. Take it from me, I’m a female and have been working for 43 years. In the beginning, I worked for men, now I have been unlucky enough in the last 10 years to work for 3 woman. Let me tell you, that has been the worst experience of my life. I hate to say it, because I am a woman and I pushed for woman to “break the glass ceiling,” but my feeling is the workplace suffered horribly when women were promoted to management and it’s been vetted and is pretty much common knowledge. I should say, everyone is aware of it, except to management, who turns a blind eye. I feel for you just getting started because I am almost ready to depart but I will say if I had to begin my career now, instead of 43 years ago, I don’t believe things would have turned out as well for me, career wise, if I had to deal with female managers lording over me. It’s very simplistic, they don’t like other females working next to them in the workplace and fall real easy into a disgusting queen-bee mode. My advice to you, steer FAR away if at all possible if there are any female bosses involved in the new job. You will be much better off. There are bad male bosses, sure, and there are plenty of inept ones but for the most part, the male managers I’ve had are fair and treat you with respect and dignity for the most part. Female bosses don’t do that. They want to put all the females down and micromanage and nitpick to the hilt. Terrible. Stay away and you will do fine.


    July 18, 2012 at 11:15 pm

  17. I’ve worked for many female bosses and my experience has been grim.

    I have found women bosses to be petty, poor at making decisions (in business – decisions are everything!) and they love power plays!

    I have worked for two male bosses and they have both been great – because they said what they meant – and meant what they said.

    There isn’t a glass ceiling – it’s simply the fact that people prefer to work for a male boss – as they: make decisions – get things done – and mean what they say.

    Discuss 🙂

    Terry Matthews

    December 20, 2012 at 4:05 pm

  18. they are certainly the worst, and many of them think that they are all that with a very bad attitude. so very sad.


    March 13, 2013 at 2:41 pm

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    telefonos moviles libres

    March 14, 2013 at 5:43 pm

  20. Late to the party here, but i Had to comment. I’m nine years into my career. Have had 5 women bosses in various cities and all have been absolute nightmares. I have been forced out of jobs, fired and quit – each time facing severe physical and mental health issues and financial disarray as a result of the complete abuse and disrespect women bosses inflict on a day to day basis. Ironically, I am a minority female, and have had the absolute best experiences with older white male bosses (and no, I am not the flirty, goo goo eyes type at all). My advice to any young female professional to stay away from women bosses. They are absolutely horrible and have no respect whatsoever for junior members of their staff. Do they see other women as a threat? unqualified? stupid? unable to leary? I don’t know. I have multiple degrees from top universities and I have been called all of these. I laugh at all of this talk about “breaking the glass ceiling.” From what I can see, women have failed to break any ceiling because they are horrifying to work with and for – it has nothing to do with men.

    you could not have said it better

    October 9, 2013 at 2:30 am

  21. I work for a female boss (I’m male) and it is a grim experience. She is often defensive, moody, argumentative…. I don’t need this at this stage of my career.

    Just hope to God my next boss is male.


    October 23, 2013 at 2:33 pm

  22. Just started working for my first female boss. I lasted 9 days. Worst person I’ve ever worked for by such a way I can’t find words to describe it.

    She must have felt threatened by my experience as she tried to humiliate me constantly and her posse (3 women and 1 middle class ponce) all joined in. I am a better person than her and she was probably right I could do her job better than her.

    Fat, ugly, divorced and bearded…..this might be indicative of an overian problem so no kids. Interestingly none of her bitches had kids too. I hope they all die lonely. I walked out and as such have to try and get a job with this on my record.

    By the way I’m a man with 25 years management experience. I would have doubted myself if I hadn’t. She could have destroyed a weaker person.

    Carl Madigan

    November 9, 2013 at 5:27 pm

  23. I have once again had the displeasure to work for a female boss, that yes again is abusive both verbally and physically. i feel that women must feel the need to power trip on employees because they are so insecure of their own positions of management. Iam disgusted that many women put up with this bad behaviour that is clearly totally unexceptable in any job in the workplace. i feel that women bosses are so afraid of loosing these better paid positions and when they feel you are better or more experienced, they feel the need to act totally crazy. My last boss physically assaulted me by pushing me down a hallway for helping a fellow employee at the time. My current boss, bullies and is starting to be physically abusive with me and other women. She has already grabbed me forcibly by my hand and has smacked a clip board across another womans back. She constantly makes rude comments to her staff and puts everyone in a bad mood. Customers have told her that she looks like she is going to rip their heads off….not good for business, and if it was mine i would fire her on the spot!!!It is a shame that these women are so brutal in treating others and yet get away with it all the time. I dont know how people stand it. I guess because iam older i know more my rights in the workplace and have zero tolerance for bad bosses…..my advice is to tell them that they dont have to be rude and go above them and say how bad their behaviour is affecting everyone and customers and giving the business a bad reputation….cuz when people quit…they talk about it later!!!!!


    November 10, 2013 at 4:48 pm

  24. It seems to me that in my experience, it’s the younger female managers that are hard to get along with.

    I’ve worked under a few women in the past, and the older ones have generally been more reasonable and businesslike, whereas the younger women (in their early to mid twenties) that I had to work under, were awful.

    They used to make inappropriate demands, acted like they felt a need to assert their authority all the time, and used to play mind games with me (e.g. withholding information, setting me up to make an incorrect decision, and then secretly telling my boss). One of them even flat out made a blatantly inappropriate, offensive sexual remark to me after I emptied her wastebasket.

    I stumbled upon this article because I was trying to figure out if this was typical or if I was just unlucky.

    Also (in my experience), female business owners and upper-level managers seem to be a little more professional than the lower-level managers (who tended to be awful).


    December 17, 2013 at 10:01 pm

  25. It’s comforting to know that I’m not the only female that feels this way. Women bosses are the worst! I work for two female partner attorneys and they are just awful employers! They have no managerial skills. One is a coward who runs away from any type of confrontation and the other is just a loud mouth who thinks she never makes mistakes. So, how do you speak with one of your bosses when something is bothering you at the work place? You bite your tongue which makes you a bitter employee.


    January 13, 2014 at 7:50 pm

  26. I’ve had awesome jobs that I quit specifically due to a female boss. I recently got hired at a dream job that I wanted for a long time and since it’s been 5 years since I last had a female boss I thought it would be ok. Boy, was I wrong!! She’s just as terrible as the female boss I had 5 years ago! Total Jekyll and Hyde. Screaming about a small mistake the one second and the suggary sweet “how was your weekend” the next. It’s the fake-ness that I cannot stand. Someone who is a bully rather than a mentor should not pretend to be my friend the next second. I have only been hete for 5 months but already I am a “senior” employee, meaning everyone that works here quits very quickly. And not because of the job. I’ve had coworkers say they won’t go to corporate parties because she tries to then suddenly be chummy and your best friend. While treating you like a dog the day after. For example I recognized a customer that came in but I was very busy at the time so I said I would give him a call asap. I knew him, he knew me, so I did not write his phone number down. I would look it up under his name when I had time. I would say, it would be better to write it down due to danger of forgetting to do it later. But she completely lost it! “you are a good for nothing! don’t you have any common sense? You will stay here and work unpaid overtime until you have his number! Are you f&&(-, kidding me! I am so disapointed in you!” Of coure I found the nr within 5 min. But I was shaking and nearly crying! No boas has ever spoken that rudely to me before! To me, she’s a boss but certainly not someone I respect as a leader. A bully and a fakr.
    Another female boss I had prviously mainly bullied the foreign employees that she saw as “lower” than her, even though she was an immigrant herself! I guess that one really suffered from ” I worked hard and suffered to get here and now you shall too” Neither of those female bosses was ever a mentor. Both (unsurprisingly) were single and childless and in their early 40’s too.


    July 7, 2016 at 6:54 am

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